Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Heat and Exhaustion Equal Crankiness

Every school year I change:  I AM WORN OUT.   The new schedule and the heat are a deadly combination.

School started Monday.  And the preschool does not stagger attendance in the beginning so all 14 little ones showed up at the same time.  And their teachers from last year came right along with them.  Can you spell ANNOYING?  The adults have got to go. There are way too many bosses in one room.  To whom do you listen?

Today is going to be different.  We have 2 long confusing days under our belt and it's time to stand up straight and take charge.

I've been taking charge of several things lately and it feels good.   Had a strong talk with Cruella yesterday evening.  And for the first time in my life I set up some limits.  She was caught off guard and shocked, I'm sure.  It didn't change her attitude or her sassy ways but it sure felt good to change mine.  The "Kick Me" sign came off and I took charge. Deal with it.

I also had another one of those moments when you have no doubt in your mind that our Lord and Savior spoke directly to you.  It was as if I heard it out loud.  It's happened to me before.   I'm sure it's from Heaven is that peace and relief that I feel in that same moment.  It's like "Oh............. you're right.  Whew.  Thanks"   Yep, I had just gotten off the phone with Cruella.  And I was angry.  Feeling spent and justified and a tad triumphant that I had stood up to her.  But as the minutes went by I began to think about the future........ and what is inevitably going to happen when she dies.  Honestly.  I thought about that.  And how awful the funeral service will be......... and how cruelly I will be treated.  And how for dang sure my kids will not attend.  But then I heard this voice.......... as if someone were in the room standing right next to me............ "You don't have to go"  And then I felt such relief.  And, well, peaceful.  It never occurred to me that I wouldn't have to go.  What?  I don't have to attend Cruella's funeral?
Funerals are for people who are left behind.  Family, friends.  You hear the expression "Paying your respects"  What you are really doing is paying respect to the family and friends who are grieving.  Obviously the dead person will not know if you are there or not as they are hopefully in a peaceful place.  And so..........  I don't have to go. Whenever and wherever it is.  When it happens.  All the ruckus and stress and idiocy that will go along with it............ I don't have to go.  WOW!  I DON'T HAVE TO GO!!!  I can decide in my own way what I can do.  And then it dawned on me.  When the day comes.......... I have a plan.  Thank you for the peace that passes all understanding.
Until that time I'll have many many horrible events.  I'm not looking forward to them.
But now I know I have it in me to set the limits and make sure they are not compromised.
Here's what I've decided:
I don't want to talk anymore
I never want to visit
I never want to go to her house
I never want her to come to my house
I do not want to invite her to any social events in the future.  Ever.
I am angry.
I am frustrated.
I've passed through the grieving into the anger phase.  I can feel a sense of disinterest.  Like that person who made fun of you once in junior high.  It embarrassed you and all that and you hated them.  But now you can think back on it and although you still remember how awful it is and you, frankly, still hate the bully........... you're past it.  It's not something you think about every day.  It's almost like you forgot about it.
I've forgotten. Not about the anger.......... but I just don't include it my routine.

I don't care.
And I don't want to care
And I may never care again

Tomorrow this blog will be back to normal.  :_

Sunday, August 14, 2011


Found one camera!  Found one charger!  Photos shall be shown on this blog soon!!

I know I've missed a few days here and there.  It's just been a busy month.  But school starts tomorrow and we'll be back on a schedule.  So this blog will be attended daily.

Thank you.  And Amen.

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Old Age and Heat Wave

Today is was 111.  One hundred eleven degrees at 4pm.  It was so hot it zapped any energy I have left.
Today was the first day back at work.  There were meetings upon meetings.  I began to feel the anxiety of information overload.

I had told Dancer Girl that I'd take her to Target when I got home but I was so worn out and it was 111*.  So we decided to wait until after supper to go.  But by that time exhaustion had really settled into my bones and I just couldn't go.  She said, "That's okay.  I didn't want to go anyway.  Today is my lazy stay at home day"

Well enjoy it now.  School starts in 4 days.

Conversations on a cell phone

It's just too hard for me to have a long conversation on a cell phone.  I can take quick messages like those from the exterminator "I'll be there in the morning at 9am" or from a child of mine wanting to relay their desire for me to add one more thing to the grocery list.  But to have a long conversation?  Forget about it.  The other person is just too hard to hear.  They barely move their mouth from the speaker and whammo - I can't hear a word they are saying.

But the worst thing about talking on a cell phone is the delay.  And the most difficult person to talk with on a cell phone is Ironman.  He wins the prize.  The delay in my speaking and them him LISTENING (cough) and then replying.......... ugh. He is always talking over me.  And then he'll say "go ahead"  Uh........ I was going ahead if you would JUST WAIT UNTIL I'M FINISHED WITH MY SENTENCE.

Is it the cell phone's fault?  Is it the service area?  Is it the provider?  Is it the stupid humans that are operating the device?  I don't know.

The only thing I like about my cell phone is the 1. texting and 2. internet access

And that is all folks.

Thursday, August 4, 2011


Since we've moved into our new house we have
painted the porch rockers to match the shutters. Check
painted a small dresser from Pier One to use as a TV stand in Engineer's bedroom.  Check
Sanded a large armoire to use to hold board games and electronics in the game room.  Check.  (not primed and painted yet.  It's so hot I have to cut my work day into "before 10" and "after 7pm" outside painting time. Can't use the paint above 90 degrees.  Besides, it's too hot for humans)
Hung curtains.

Unpacked boxes and boxes and boxes.

I still have not found camera equipment.  I have no idea ............. I'll keep looking.

Parent meeting tonight at the high school. It's too hot, people.  Too hot.

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Foot in Mouth Disease

What should you do when someone speaking to you puts their foot in their mouth?
Do you just stand there and watch them squirm?
Do you help them out a little by pretending you didn't hear or by making a little joke?

I had a lady come by my new house today.  She immediately told me she had driven past this neighborhood many times but had never pulled in.  And "Wow, it's different............ It's kinda odd.............. I mean, what am I trying to say........... it's a lot like............. you know what I"m trying to say?"

I just stood there quietly and let her dig herself out of the hole.

Once the shampoo girl commented, when I mentioned I.T. girl was home working on her imovie, that when she was "a teenager I sure didn't stay home.  I sure was running the street and hanging out with friends.  No way I sat at home.  That's crazy"  I just let it slide.

Once years ago I introduced myself to a woman who knew my husband.  I thought she knew who I was............ that I was Ironman's wife....... and so to be standing in the same room and not say anything would be awkward.  So I took the mature road and introduced myself to her.  I just happened to be 8 months pregnant.
"Hello, my name is Red Shoes.  I'm Ironman's Wife"

To which she replied with wide eyed shock:  "You are Ironman's Wife?"

Who did you expect, Princess Diana?

People are idiots.

Oh, just remembered this one.  From MIL.  She once gave me a comforter and several pillows saying, "these are so ugly.  I thought they were pretty in the store but when I got them home I just hated them they are so ugly.  So here, RedShoes, you can have them.  I sure don't like them"

Moving Update

Stuff we can't find:

camera chargers.  To any of our cameras.  I guess they are packed together.  Therefore no photos on this blog lately

Dancer girl says she can't find some of her wall art

Wood filer

Electric drill  **update, I found it today in the laundry room on a shelf above the dryer

Moving is hard work.

Stuff that is so much better in the new house:

Living Areas
Outdoor patio
Storage Space
Laundry Room
DirectTv - we dropped Comcast

Monday, August 1, 2011

Wow.  We moved to our new house.  It was so much WORK!  One week later we only have a few boxes left to unpack, some furniture in our garage that will get a fresh coat of paint, and no camera chargers. That's right. Can't charge up our little cameras.

So I went online last night.  Did a search for the Canon DSLR I really, really want.  I mean, I REALLY want.  (Along with the electrical shock case that will keep little fingers away from it)

I will be saving my money to get this camera.  And guess what else?  I'm not going to tell anybody!

I return to work August 10th.
Dancer girl returns to school August 15
I.T. girl returns to school August 18.
The Engineer returns to school Sunday.  August 7.  I'm going to meet him on campus with a van load of his dorm essentials.  Since he has a student leader meeting at 1pm that will leave me alone in his dorm room to unpack.  And yes, I will be unpacking, organizing, sorting, cleaning.  He can let it go to pot after I leave.

Then I'm going to have to do some shopping for myself.  I like to shop for anything except clothes.  So I hope there are some good deals out there to soften the anxiety level.

I have many blog ideas on the calendar.  So now that the moving stress has subsided I'm going to get right on them