Dear Shoppers:

I spent a long day working and then I went to the grocery store.  It was destined to be one of those BIG shopping trips as we were out of everything from milk to paper towels to fruit and vegetables.

As I drove into the parking lot there seems to be plenty of empty spaces.  That gave me hope that the store wouldn't be annoyingly crowded.  I grabbed my purse, my cell phone, my coupon binder and my patience.  Where did all these people come from?  It was "bumper to bumper".

As I shopped I made a mental note of things that need improvement.  So here goes:

Dear Shoppers,

1.  When shopping with a calculator, please scoot to the side so other shoppers can continue to gather items.  It is very annoying to be stuck behind you as you enter digits s l o w l y into your handheld device one by one by one.  I understand you are watching your budget but you are in my way!

2.  If you MUST talk on the cell phone in the store, please do so quietly.  I don't have any interest in hearing your drama.   (I once got a long distance phone call on my cell while shopping.  As quickly as I could I walked all the way over to the far end of the store by the pharmacy area.  There was only one person within 30 feet of me and even though I was talking as quietly as I could.............and trying to make the call a swift one..........the pharmacist continued to give me the evil eye for the 3 minutes I was there. )  I did not give you, Mrs Cell Phone Talker, the evil eye.  But you gave me a headache.

3.  Stockers.  Why?  Why?  Why?  Why must you block the entire aisle with boxes?  And why won't you move out of the way for half a sec so I can grab the Special K?  And really, must you stock the shelves at 5pm?  Wouldn't it be less intrusive to your shoppers if you stocked the shelves late at night?  I passed up a few things from my list because I just couldn't get to them.  You were in my way!

4.  Then there are the shoppers who woke up in a new world today.  They have never been to a grocery store.  Not only are they absolutely LOST as to location of the soy sauce, they don't even know what soy sauce is!

5.  Oh yes, there are more complaints.

I'm racing the clock today as I had to pick up Dancer Girl after her play practice.  And I was tired.  Oh, so tired.  I'm flipping through my coupon binder and suddenly hear a voice say, "How long does it take you to put all the coupons together?"  I looked up and saw an unfriendly face.  Before I could answer he said, "You must not have anything else to do"

6.  I finally make it to the checkout line with my bulging buggy and the lady in front of me was asked the question "Did you find everything you need?".........okay, is that a crazy question?  Because if I had NOT found everything I need I wouldn't be checking out.  Right??  Well, that's what I thought .  The woman in front of me answered, "Well, I couldn't find the corn nuts."   And that began the goose chase.  Who can find the corn nuts.  I am too tired to tell you how many people walked over from the store and tried to locate the missing corn nuts.  I just stood there trying to stay awake.  Yes, I was tired.

I finally paid, packed the trunk and pulled away.  I did make it in time to pick up Dancer Girl.  I came home and my daughters made biscuits, bacon, eggs and grits for supper.

TWO MORE DAYS UNTIL SPRING BREAK.  But who's counting?